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Criminal Charges: Child Molestation, Sexual Abuse, Domestic terrorism Martial Status: Unknown (Most Likely Single) Children: 1 (Adopted & Fostered) <br>Gender: Male

Ken Kaniff aka Ken Kenneth (Tony Maloney Rose) is a recurring character in skits and, initially, songs on Eminem's albums.

He was originally made and voiced by Aristotle on the skit "Ken Kaniff" on The Slim Shady LP. However, a dispute between him and Eminem resulted in both artists severing ties.

The character, as he appears on The Marshall Mathers LP, has since been voiced exclusively by Eminem, while Aristotle's original version of Ken still exists as a bisexual, adult male still attending high school. Ken is portrayed as having an expansive imagination coupled alongside a distinctly psychopathic mind state which rationalizes both pedophilia and an irrational hate for minor authority figures.

On The Slim Shady LP, Ken has his own skit in which he calls Eminem and proposes to him multiple gay practices in a hotel room on which Eminem just laughs and mentions rapper Cage (with whom he had beef at the time) when he asks Ken, "Yo, who is this, Cage?" On Madd Rapper's album, "Tell 'Em Why U Madd" in 1999, he appears in intro of the 9th track of album, "Stir Crazy." He returns on The Marshall Mathers LP, once again in a skit named after him, where he receives fellatio by Shaggy and Jay - this skit is the, therefore, diss against the group, Insane Clown Posse. He appears on the song, "Criminal," saying "amen" when Eminem tells him to give him an "amen". On The Eminem Show, the character appears in a skit called "Curtains Close", where he steps up to an empty stage with no audience and parodies the intro of the song, "Without Me" in the microphone, changing the words to sound homosexual. On Relapse , he is also presented on the outro of the album in a skit at the end of the song "Underground," where he once again parodies songs from the album (Relapse + Relapse: Refill songs "My Mom" and "We Made You") in a session of people struggling with some kind of dependency. He apparently accompanies his freestyle with a tap dance. Ken can later be heard on The Marshall Mathers LP 2 singing a parody of "Berzerk" in a bathroom at the end of "Wicked Ways" on the deluxe version and the end of "Evil Twin" on the standard edition album. Outside of his roles within Eminem's skits and songs, he was given a place as one of the major characters on The Slim Shady Show, where he is portrayed as a skinny red-haired Caucasian; in reality he is a dirty blond with a mustache that works for Krohn Media.

In 2002, he got his own album, The Ken Kaniff Show, where it is confirmed that he is in fact, a pedophile.

He is also on Twitter, and he is followed by Jonah Hill.

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Parodies[]

"Ken Kaniff" - The Slim Shady LP - Aristotle, Eminem, and Mark Bass[]

Ken: Call this motherfucker

Ken: Oh fuck yeah. Give 'em a piece of my mind a piece of my ass.

Ken: Oh thank you. I need to make a collect call.

Ken: Oh, the number's 62 --

Operator: At the tone, please state your name.

Ken: Ken Kaniff, from Connecticut (automated piece of shit).

Ǝ: Yo.

Ken: Hey there cockboy

Ǝ: Who's this?

Ken: This is Ken Kaniff.

Ǝ: Who?

Ken: Ken Kaniff from Connecticut, little bitch.

Ǝ: From Connecticut?

Ken: Yeah you wanna get a --

Ǝ: I don't know nobody in Connecticut

Ken: You wanna get a hotel room with me?

Ǝ: A hotel room?

Ken: Yeah, you want me to lick your ass, Eminem?

Ǝ: Ha, yo, wh, who is this? Cage?

Ken: You want me to fuckin' melt in your mouth and not in your hand? Melt in your ass, ya little cockboy?

Ǝ: Yo shut up you little bitch

Ken: Oh you think I'm lyin', huh?

Ǝ: Haha

"Ken Kaniff" - The Marshall Mathers LP[]

"Curtains Close" - The Eminem Show - (Parodies "Without Me")[]

"Is this thing on?

Where'd everybody go?

...Guess who's back?

Back again...

Ken is back...tell some men.

Rub my back, rub my back,

Rub my back, rub my back...

Hello...?

Good night."

"Without You" - The Ken Kaniff Show - (Parodies "Without Me")[]

[Aristotle]
Cause, I'm not saying it about Dre, you know what I mean, Eminem whatever

[Ken Kaniff]
Hey dude, hey dude. Dude. Dude! Don't even trip dude. Fuck Dre!

Obie trice, Em's gimmick, bit-

Intro
One blonde-haired rapper likes it inside, likes it inside, likes it inside
One blonde-haired rapper likes it inside, likes it inside, likes it inside, yeeeaaaah
Guess who's back, back again?
Ken is back, tell some men
Guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back
Guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back
Guess who's back
Ooooooooh yeah
Ooooooooh yeeeah

Verse 1
A-tisket a-tasket, man I get my ass licked
By little Slim baby, he's obsessed with f****ts
Obies mad that Eminem's an addict
Proof's getting jealous, so he signed to Maverick
Boy bands rule, man I love Kirkpatrick
And Timberlake too, now that Britney passed it
Elton John's cute, for an older bastard
I shouldn't talk about your boyfriend like that, Slim
I'm back di di di da da da daddy day
I saw you holding hands the other night with Dr. Dre
What you? Cause then you know what I'm telling
You're a bitch with no clip in your gun, you ain't a felon
Ken Kaniff kid, got you screaming who's real
8 mile then, and now you live in Bluefield
This is over, man I'm done, its outro
Another diss song that will rip your asshole

Chorus
Now this looks like another job for Ken
So everybody, women and men
Scream, shout it out loud now, "FUCK YOU SLIM!"
Cause my voice sounds wack when its done by him

Now this looks like another job for Ken
So everybody, women and men
Scream, shout it out loud now, "FUCK YOU SLIM!"
Cause my voice sounds wack when its done by him

Verse 2
Fuck Eminem, Mel-Man, Xzibit and Dre
Two thousand and trey, all hell dissing away
I'm still a barfly, motherfucker siphon in starlight
Black rappers hate me like a honkey with the foureyes
Alright D12, double personality
6 MC's on a one person salary
I know it sounds bizarre and Bizarre's just a bitch
Nobody knows why Slim Shady signed Swift
Detroit, oh shit, that's a scary place to live
Its way worse than Los Angeles where everyone's a critic
8 Mile, 9 Mile, that's hella complicated
The way you making sure people don't get lost when they're faded
I'm sick of the bullshit, let's bury the gats
I just drank a fifth of vodka, dare me to rap?
I'm off this track, I'm pointing a finger at you
Call Dido and Spawn by singing a tune

Chorus
Now this looks like another job for Ken
So everybody, women and men
Scream, shout it out loud now, "FUCK YOU SLIM!"
Cause my voice sounds wack when its done by him

Now this looks like another job for Ken
So everybody, women and men
Scream, shout it out loud now, "FUCK YOU SLIM!"
Cause my voice sounds wack when its done by him

Verse 3
Ken Kaniff is what Eminem isn't
Another white rapper, that ain't like Limp Bizkit
This is bitch shit, you're a punk to risk it
Come over to Connecticut and get your wrists slit
For real now, you ain't gotta rap to talk it
Your baby mother's fat, and she runs your pocket
7 platinum, but you signed to Weber
Your moneys fucked up, dip down in the red
Eminem's gay, I'm a homosex
But Eminem's played, I don't know what's next
Ya'll I'm on my period and ovulating
Shut the fuck up, you're a bitch Miss Shady
Come on f*gs hit me for the shit I'm talking
I got your whole fan base going and jacking
Feeling what I spit, when I diss the icon
And get your ass fucked, by an orange pylon

Chorus
Now this looks like another job for Ken
So everybody, women and men
Scream, shout it out loud now, "FUCK YOU SLIM!"
Cause my voice sounds whack when its done by him
Now this looks like another job for Ken

So everybody, women and men
Scream, shout it out loud now, "FUCK YOU SLIM!"
Cause my voice sounds whack when its done by him

Outro
Aww, yeah
C'mon, come over here, Eminem
Imma give you a milk chocolate
Let me slide up in that Hershey highway
JD was telling me about how you and Dre used to get fucking naked at the hotel and suck each others cocks
Black white, looked like a fucking vanilla yogurt twist or something like that
Come on bitch, come here bitch, you're just a bitch
Ken Kaniff, fuck you
And everybody you roll with
Come on Dre, I'll turn you out, call me
Call me, I'll suck your cock, I'll plug your booty hole
And you talk all the shit anymore
Come on, make it happen
And suck Ken's cock, baby
You know you want to
You want to suck on the shaft of my penis and lick my balls
And lick the cum while it squirts out, get your ass pregnant or something...

"Underground" - Relapse & Relapse: Refill - (Parodies "We Made You")[]

"When you walked through the door, you were queer to me,

So come here, baby boy, just come here to me.

You're a, cock boy, everybody wants you;

You're gayer, than you would ever claim to.

I won't have to rape you...

So homie, lay down, down down, lay down, down down,

Lay down, down, down, lay down, lay down..."

"Ehh where's everybody going this always went over real big in Gay A"

"Ok wait I got another one"

"I just love condoms and lots of cum"

"No? Oh shit"

"Evil Twin" - The Marshall Mathers LP 2[]

"Wicked Ways" - The Marshall Mathers LP 2 (Deluxe) - (Parodies "Berzerk")[]

"I'm gonna rock this blouse and put a cock in my mouth,

And get my balls blew out, and get gay into the A.M.,

And lay with eighteen guys naked, and let myself show, let myself show...

Butt-fuck it, suck it, pull it, tug it,

Life's too short to not stroke your bone...

So everybody, everybody,

Circle jerk, touch my body..."


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